First of all I'm so so sorry that I've been offline, and I'm going to try to explain why in the best possible way, and maybe you will feel the same way or just understand how I felt and why I have been offline, because I really wanted to write and post, you guys have no idea, but my life as been such a mess, such a fucked up mess!
Okay so for the past month my life was a mess, there were the final exams and me getting sick, and the entire college pressure!! It was basically way to much for me to handle! It was such a pressure! I mean I had to get a super high grade in every single exam and had to finish my final project and every thing had o be P-E-R-F-E-C-T and that's just way to much pressure for a 18-year-old.
The worst thing was that during the entire time I spent on studying, i lost on staying with people that matter to me and lost great sunny days or just relaxing at home, you know? Like just drinking a cooled drink and eat some good snacks, watch some good movie, or something like that. And instead of that, instead of relaxing from an entire stress year I had to study more, memorize more and more things to take one exam that will define "how good am i?" and "which college is more accurate for my intelligence level tested in one exam", which I'm totally against because I don't thing that's the best way to define the value of a student and the pressure ruins everything!
And then you go to this room where they put the "future" of your life and you have to answer and preform your best, but you never know how good you are or how bad.... And I feel like it is so frustrating.